Scott Summers States His Case
by Red Witch
Summary: Scott provides a rebuttal to his depiction in a certain new cartoon being shown. He's not happy. But when is he ever?


**I just thought I'd let you know that I don't own any X-Men characters no matter what cartoon. Just a crazy idea how some Evolution characters might react to the new cartoon. Some of them might not be too happy with it. Gee I wonder why?**

**Scott Summers States His Case**

"Good evening," Scott Summers sat at a desk. "I know usually you people have come to expect the Brotherhood putting on one of these stupid little shows. But tonight I thought I'd try something different for a change! Like telling the **truth!**"

"This should be good," Todd was heard snickering off camera.

"I am here to provide a rebuttal against a certain new cartoon show staring a certain clawed Canadian nutcase!" Scott said sharply. "Namely how yours truly here is depicted. I've seen the show. I'm **not** happy."

"Are you **ever?**" Pietro was heard off camera.

"Look I don't know who is writing these things but lately they are so way off base it's not funny!" Scott went on. "The recent comics are bad enough but this is one step too far! This show shows me as a stuck up insecure whiner who never deserved to be leader of the X-Men and only got the job because of his ties with Xavier and Jean!"

"You mean you're **not?**" Lance called off camera. "Since when?"

"To be fair I don't think Summers is **that** insecure," Fred spoke.

"I just want to present my side and prove to all of you that I am nothing like this…Spineless self absorbed wuss that is supposed to be me!" Scott snapped.

"That's right Summers," Lance was heard saying. "Dream big."

"Okay I admit that if I did lose Jean because of some devastating accident I would be devastated!" Scott said. "Who **wouldn't **be? But I'd like to think that I'd do something more productive than sit around watching TV feeling sorry for myself!"

"That's right," Lance quipped. "He's more likely to run several Danger Room sessions while feeling sorry for himself. There **is **a difference."

"And if God forbid something did happen to the Professor and there was a huge disaster I wouldn't just up and leave everyone!" Scott said. "I would try and rebuild. Technically I already did that! **Remember?** Season Four ring a bell? The Institute was blown up and the Professor was missing…We were on the run. And Wolverine wanted to tear apart an entire army? But I wouldn't let him and he threw a hissy fit and ran away while we had to deal with the army and Juggernaut? Anybody recall **that**?"

"You never let us **forget **it," Lance called out.

"I just find it funny that they made the one guy on our team the **least** likely to promote peace is supposed to be leading the X-Men!" Scott threw up his hands. "The man can't go five minutes without popping his claws and shredding something and he's supposed to be the savior of mutant kind? What is that about? Why him and not me?"

"Because he's more marketable, duh!" Fred called out. "Even I knew that!"

"Right! That's it! The almighty dollar replaces _common sense!"_ Scott snapped.

"Hard to replace what you never had," Pietro snickered.

"See that's **another reason** I hate this new show," Scott pointed behind him. "I have to put up with stupid cracks like that! To be fair it's not much different than usual but still it's another straw that is breaking my back!"

"If only that was true literally," Lance remarked.

"Maybe I am a little uptight but I have good reason to be," Scott said. "Do you people realize who I have to **live** with?"

"Man has a point," Todd said. "That place is full of whack jobs."

"Well it is called the Xavier **Institute,**" Lance told him.

"Seriously, if I wasn't watching out and making sure everyone was keeping their powers in check, the place would have burned down by now," Scott said. "Well again anyway. The mansion would be destroyed a lot more than it has been! And trust me the adults provide very **little** help!"

"Here comes the fun part," Pietro chuckled.

"Ororo is fine when she's **there**," Scott said. "But when she's not I swear I am all that stands between order and Armageddon! Obviously Wolverine is no help because he takes off to the bar or who knows where any chance he gets! Beast is usually hiding in his lab trying to get out of a Danger Room session with the New Mutants. And the Professor…Well…Let's just say sometimes his mind **isn't **on his work."

Scott made a drinking motion with his hand. "He thinks just because he doesn't stumble around half drunk no one notices, but I notice! One time he locked himself inside Cerebro for _three hours straight_. Claimed he was working on Cerebro. He was working all right! Working on a bottle of **scotch**! Cerebro wasn't even on! To be fair it was the day he gave Kitty a driving lesson and they ended up on the freeway. But still…"

"That would drive the Pope to drink!" Pietro called out.

"You're not exactly a careful driver either, Quicksilver," Lance told him.

"If this is about that traffic ticket the other day, that was simply an example of mutant prejudice!" Pietro protested. "I had the right of way!"

"Not on the sidewalk!" Lance barked.

"You know Xavier drinking would explain a few things," Todd remarked.

Scott let out a breath. "I like to have fun. I do! I'm not all work."

"Summers, waxing your car or running a level 12 Danger Room session isn't technically fun," Lance called out. "Doesn't count!"

"As I was saying I like to have fun but because of certain **other people**," Scott glared behind him for a moment. "I rarely get the chance. The shocking part is that most of it isn't because of the Brotherhood. So if I am a little uptight, it's only to ensure that I don't go insane and **kill** everyone in sight! No matter how **tempting **it is!"

"Scott…" Jean walked out with the Brotherhood Boys. "I think you're telling people a little more than you need too."

"No, no! I think I've only just started!" Scott snapped as he stood up. "That reminds me of **another** thing I want to address! That little thing your character did. You know? Where that Jean flirted with Wolverine right in **front** of my character?"

"Yeah I saw that too," Fred chuckled. "Way to disrespect your guy Jean!"

"I know! Jean what is **wrong** with you?" Pyro asked.

"That wasn't me!" Jean protested. "Okay that was me, but not **me**! Not the real me! You know what I mean!"

"Not really," Pietro grinned. "Elaborate."

"They only did that because it was in the comics a long, long time ago…" Jean said.

"And the movies," Todd added. "And in books. Older cartoons. Graphic novels. Fan fiction…"

"Toad!" Jean snapped.

"No, no he's got a point!" Scott snapped. "It happens in almost every single thing that comes out nowadays!"

"Except in Evolution," Pyro said. "But I guess it wouldn't look good if Marvel's cash cow was a pedophile."

"Will you people **shut up?"** Jean said. "Scott, you know there is nothing between me and Wolverine! I love you!"

"Prove it," Fred said.

"Yeah prove it!" Todd said.

Jean glared at him. "You know if I thought you had a brain in there I'd give you all a massive headache!"

"No, they have the right idea!" Scott folded his arms.

"What do you want me to do? Take an oath?" Jean asked, angry.

"Why not? You made me take one about Emma Frost!" Scott shouted.

"That was totally different!" Jean shouted.

"How? How was **that **different?" Scott yelled.

"I can think of two reasons," Pietro snickered.

"You know that cartoon was right about one thing! You are **insecure**!" Jean said to Scott. "But if this will make you **happy**, I'll do it! I Jean Grey, do solemnly swear that I am in love with Scott Summers and **only** Scott Summers and **not **attracted to Wolverine at all! Got it?'

"Jean why are your fingers crossed behind you?" Todd took a peek. Jean responded by telekinetically shoving him off the set. "AAAAHHHH!"

"Scott are we **done** here?" Jean asked, very annoyed. "Have you said anything you wanted to say?"

"Let me check the list," Scott took out a list. "Angry about Wolverine being the star. Check. Set the record straight about me being a leader. Check. Explaining why I'm so uptight all the time, check…"

"Yeah you're not _anal retentive_ at all," Lance rolled his eyes. "Summers, it's not an angry rant if you need to use a **checklist!"**

"Oh wait, there is one thing I forgot to do," Scott said.

"What? Iron your underwear?" Lance snorted.

"No," Scott folded his list and put it into his pocket. "THIS!" With a swift punch he hit Lance hard.

"Oh you wanna play it like that Summers?" Lance growled.

"You bet I wanna play it like that!" Scott yelled. "I'm mad as hell and I'm not gonna take it anymore! So I'm gonna start by taking it out on **you!**"

"Go for it!" Lance roared and tackled Scott. Soon the two of them were wrestling around on the ground.

"Scott! What are you doing? Will you stop this?" Jean fumed. "Scott!"

"You know the man is going to have a complete nervous breakdown by the time he's thirty, right?" Fred told her.

"I've had it! I'm going home!" Jean stormed out. "Scott you can just walk home for all I care! I am not going to put up with you acting like a selfish jerk who thinks violence is the only way to solve problems!"

"Why **not?**" Scott shouted as he wrestled Lance. "IT WORKS FOR WOLVERINE!"

"Well you gotta admit it's a step in the right direction," Todd shrugged.

"If we can get him to blow up a few buildings we're talking mini series!" Pyro said. "Dibs on being his agent!"

"Those studies are so right," Pietro remarked. "Cartoons really do inspire violence."


End file.
